










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 393 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 130 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




150 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3222 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,779 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1418 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1379 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2187 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 795 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,350,848 of utility $269 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 414 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SoapyBottoms | 49% | 253 |
| #2 | tethala | 37% | 43 |
| #3 | imbiscuit365 | 31% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SoapyBottoms | 49% | 253 |
| #2 | tethala | 37% | 43 |
| #3 | imbiscuit365 | 31% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SoapyBottoms | 36 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | imbiscuit365 | 8 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | tethala | 3 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SoapyBottoms | 171 | 0.03 | 4 min |
| #2 | tethala | 31 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #3 | imbiscuit365 | 30 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SoapyBottoms | +1.91 | 49 | 46 |
| #2 | tethala | +0.94 | 16 | 23 |
| #3 | Tod | -0.38 | 34 | 35 |
| #4 | imbiscuit365 | -3.51 | 20 | 40 |





