








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 236 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 401 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4239 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,262 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8137 | 30% |
| Smokes | 8296 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4766 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 6063 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,788,736 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 897 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mark | 66% | 100 |
| #2 | Laced Zyns | 64% | 80 |
| #3 | Skillzzmcgee | 55% | 53 |
| #4 | fecaL matterS | 51% | 433 |
| #5 | Unwanted Fetus | 51% | 186 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mark | +6.59 | 89 | 42 |
| #2 | Laced Zyns | +2.70 | 66 | 49 |
| #3 | Skillzzmcgee | +0.50 | 37 | 48 |
| #4 | Unwanted Fetus | +0.43 | 16 | 47 |
| #5 | fecaL matterS | -0.07 | 47 | 49 |





