








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 310 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 275 matches | ||
| Wingman | 130 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4315 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,072 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2499 | 41% |
| Smokes | 2786 | 46% |
| HE Grenades | 471 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 316 | 5% |
Our logs show you have wasted $899,861 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3051 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snowy | 61% | 33 |
| #2 | hipfiar.com | 45% | 106 |
| #3 | Fratlaps | 40% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snowy | 61% | 33 |
| #2 | hipfiar.com | 45% | 106 |
| #3 | Fratlaps | 40% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hipfiar.com | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Fratlaps | 3 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hipfiar.com | 159 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #2 | Fratlaps | 42 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | Snowy | 9 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snowy | +0.57 | 17 | 19 |
| #2 | hipfiar.com | +0.55 | 24 | 39 |
| #3 | void reality | +0.03 | 61 | 27 |
| #4 | Fratlaps | -1.38 | 26 | 43 |





