








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 417 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 319 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2996 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,280 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 593 | 9% |
| Smokes | 1950 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2202 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 1535 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,122,845 of utility $267 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 154 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bleus | 42% | 97 |
| #2 | call me god | 40% | 95 |
| #3 | gunnar | 39% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bleus | 42% | 97 |
| #2 | call me god | 40% | 95 |
| #3 | gunnar | 39% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | call me god | 8 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | Bleus | 7 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | gunnar | 7 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bleus | 299 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #2 | call me god | 220 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | gunnar | 177 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gunnar | +2.18 | 76 | 73 |
| #2 | Bleus | +0.52 | 71 | 55 |
| #3 | dogeater | -0.35 | 69 | 30 |
| #4 | call me god | -2.38 | 24 | 52 |





