








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 135 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
859 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,293 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 375 | 16% |
| Smokes | 635 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 500 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 783 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $691,797 of utility $272 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 85 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tyron | 50% | 14 |
| #2 | Frank | 44% | 9 |
| #3 | Donye Wump | 42% | 26 |
| #4 | TheMightyBuu | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tyron | 50% | 14 |
| #2 | Frank | 44% | 9 |
| #3 | Donye Wump | 42% | 26 |
| #4 | TheMightyBuu | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tyron | 1 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | TheMightyBuu | 1 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donye Wump | 28 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #2 | TheMightyBuu | 13 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #3 | Frank | 9 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #4 | Tyron | 5 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frank | +6.67 | 73 | 51 |
| #2 | Donye Wump | +4.27 | 84 | 56 |
| #3 | Tyron | +1.15 | 79 | 53 |
| #4 | Harry The Midget | -0.87 | 52 | 45 |
| #5 | TheMightyBuu | -1.72 | 50 | 65 |





