








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
224 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 536 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 274 | 51% |
| Smokes | 131 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 75 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 56 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $40,180 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomy | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | JointtiJukka | 100% | 3 |
| #3 | Winser | 80% | 5 |
| #4 | JOUN4 ッ | 56% | 16 |
| #5 | 0n5ku | 50% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | JointtiJukka | 100% | 3 |
| #3 | Winser | 80% | 5 |
| #4 | JOUN4 ッ | 56% | 16 |
| #5 | 0n5ku | 50% | 12 |
| #6 | Jarkkonen | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOUN4 ッ | 1 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | tomy | 1 | 0.0256 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOUN4 ッ | 45 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #2 | Winser | 25 | 0.26 | 1 min |
| #3 | 0n5ku | 12 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #4 | tomy | 8 | 0.21 | 0 min |
| #5 | JointtiJukka | 7 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOUN4 ッ | +5.33 | 88 | 62 |
| #2 | Winser | +1.77 | 81 | 80 |
| #3 | DAE | +0.73 | 78 | 47 |
| #4 | JointtiJukka | -0.78 | 20 | 44 |
| #5 | Jarkkonen | -1.76 | 65 | 55 |





