








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 205 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
547 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,755 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1059 | 38% |
| Smokes | 714 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 376 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 606 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $133,765 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 48 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Bot Kapper | 67% | 9 |
| #7 | Gold3nTurt3l | 56% | 9 |
| #8 | LilleFede.dk | 52% | 21 |
| #9 | XZek ツ | 40% | 5 |
| #10 | Trun1eX | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XZek ツ | 2 | 0.0190 |
| #2 | LilleFede.dk | 1 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Gold3nTurt3l | 1 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | Bot Kapper | 1 | 0.0053 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LilleFede.dk | 88 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #2 | XZek ツ | 50 | 0.48 | 1 min |
| #3 | Trun1eX | 40 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | ¿Eow?¡ | 35 | 0.32 | 1 min |
| #5 | Bot Kapper | 29 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bot Kapper | +2.88 | 79 | 68 |
| #2 | ¿Eow?¡ | +1.42 | 78 | 89 |
| #3 | Bukzu2k | +1.29 | 56 | 54 |
| #4 | N 1 c k l 4 s_ | +1.24 | 64 | 76 |
| #5 | Trun1eX | +0.42 | 86 | 61 |





