








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 126 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2408 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,003 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2097 | 35% |
| Smokes | 530 | 9% |
| HE Grenades | 2182 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 1194 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $487,344 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 35 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | * | 88% | 26 |
| #2 | fear | 88% | 32 |
| #3 | AryBunny | 87% | 15 |
| #4 | aazaar | 79% | 39 |
| #5 | ☂ radioacTvT | 77% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ☂ radioacTvT | 77% | 62 |
| #6 | BE@$T™ | 74% | 66 |
| #7 | B00Ty | 73% | 30 |
| #8 | × CRISPY CHICKEN × | 71% | 31 |
| #9 | ⚡ƬhƲи∂ЄƦ619™ | 69% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aazaar | 8 | 0.0108 |
| #2 | ⚡ƬhƲи∂ЄƦ619™ | 6 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | ☂ radioacTvT | 5 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | B00Ty | 4 | 0.0066 |
| #5 | fear | 2 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⚡ƬhƲи∂ЄƦ619™ | 167 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | BE@$T™ | 114 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | ☂ radioacTvT | 103 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | * | 78 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #5 | × CRISPY CHICKEN × | 72 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | * | +7.99 | 87 | 54 |
| #2 | S. | +3.89 | 70 | 61 |
| #3 | aazaar | +3.63 | 94 | 39 |
| #4 | ☂ radioacTvT | +2.84 | 63 | 65 |
| #5 | fear | +2.68 | 72 | 45 |





