








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1540 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 260 matches | ||
| Wingman | 149 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3385 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,154 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1425 | 17% |
| Smokes | 378 | 5% |
| HE Grenades | 3028 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 3323 | 41% |
Our logs show you have wasted $605,111 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2373 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | x6 | 56% | 120 |
| #5 | 1 v | 55% | 64 |
| #6 | riot | 44% | 94 |
| #7 | pactteh | 43% | 76 |
| #8 | n | 38% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | riot | 14 | 0.0130 |
| #2 | I | 9 | 0.0079 |
| #3 | n | 9 | 0.0095 |
| #4 | pactteh | 8 | 0.0114 |
| #5 | AFK (не заебывать) | 7 | 0.0094 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | x6 | 145 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #2 | n | 80 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | pactteh | 60 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | I | 46 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | riot | 39 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | x6 | +3.75 | 85 | 63 |
| #2 | I | +3.75 | 93 | 47 |
| #3 | riot | +2.32 | 85 | 56 |
| #4 | w3w3 | +1.96 | 74 | 53 |
| #5 | pactteh | +1.68 | 53 | 54 |





