










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 34 matches | ||
| Wingman | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
316 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 225 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 0 | 0% |
| Smokes | 82 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 15 | 7% |
| Molotovs | 128 | 57% |
Our logs show you have wasted $210,912 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 157 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ajahuascasmurf | 56% | 16 |
| #2 | [CS-Γ©zus] Kockafaszfej | 44% | 9 |
| #3 | KaszΓ‘sfia | 41% | 17 |
| #4 | Meja | 40% | 5 |
| #5 | [CS-Γ©zus] Y0koo_ | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ajahuascasmurf | 4 | 0.0119 |
| #2 | KaszΓ‘sfia | 2 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | [CS-Γ©zus] Kockafaszfej | 2 | 0.0105 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [CS-Γ©zus] Y0koo_ | 52 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #2 | ajahuascasmurf | 28 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | KaszΓ‘sfia | 11 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #4 | [CS-Γ©zus] Kockafaszfej | 8 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | [CS-Γ©zus] SandorSanyi | 6 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ajahuascasmurf | +2.80 | 43 | 33 |
| #2 | [CS-Γ©zus] Y0koo_ | +2.53 | 67 | 62 |
| #3 | [CS-Γ©zus] Kockafaszfej | +0.28 | 46 | 49 |
| #4 | KaszΓ‘sfia | +0.01 | 14 | 21 |
| #5 | βͺβ | -1.79 | 66 | 26 |





