








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1207 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,097 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 819 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1116 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1068 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1094 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $152,950 of utility $64 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 63 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hali | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | Fran | 65% | 23 |
| #3 | esproxy | 65% | 20 |
| #4 | ! whiskers ⚞ᆺ⚟ | 63% | 8 |
| #5 | U Gud Bro ? | 63% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | esproxy | +5.12 | 65 | 71 |
| #2 | Rajesh Your Local Crack Dealer | +2.48 | 75 | 60 |
| #3 | Sipho Your Local Coochie Man | +2.17 | 69 | 57 |
| #4 | d o g g y ツ | +1.57 | 65 | 70 |
| #5 | VESSEL | +1.17 | 62 | 62 |





