








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1324 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 366 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 257 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2436 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,677 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2237 | 16% |
| Smokes | 3268 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4020 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 4152 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,097,315 of utility $259 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 212 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Dr.Chillpill | 38% | 107 |
| #5 | Agape | 33% | 108 |
| #6 | MotorolaEXDE | 31% | 61 |
| #7 | matsgroe87 | 28% | 32 |
| #8 | Horizon (NOR) | 22% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Danny #HardstyleDNA NORway | 15 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | Agape | 8 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Dr.Chillpill | 7 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | MotorolaEXDE | 5 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | MrFrostyNation | 4 | 0.0023 |





