








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 398 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 58 matches | ||
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 37 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




93 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3918 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,012 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3913 | 26% |
| Smokes | 5427 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 2295 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 3377 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $583,923 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3823 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bmw enjoyer | 42% | 125 |
| #2 | hubba hubba | 42% | 43 |
| #3 | the toucher | 40% | 47 |
| #4 | IDontJipJit | 40% | 40 |
| #5 | ΠΌΡΡΠ° Π»ΡΡΠ²ΡΠ½ | 33% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bmw enjoyer | 42% | 125 |
| #2 | hubba hubba | 42% | 43 |
| #3 | the toucher | 40% | 47 |
| #4 | IDontJipJit | 40% | 40 |
| #5 | ΠΌΡΡΠ° Π»ΡΡΠ²ΡΠ½ | 33% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bmw enjoyer | 46 | 0.0185 |
| #2 | ΠΌΡΡΠ° Π»ΡΡΠ²ΡΠ½ | 25 | 0.0133 |
| #3 | hubba hubba | 16 | 0.0200 |
| #4 | the toucher | 10 | 0.0109 |
| #5 | IDontJipJit | 7 | 0.0085 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ΠΌΡΡΠ° Π»ΡΡΠ²ΡΠ½ | 187 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #2 | bmw enjoyer | 181 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | IDontJipJit | 140 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | the toucher | 113 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | hubba hubba | 78 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dinosharttt | +2.50 | 73 | 56 |
| #2 | IDontJipJit | +0.78 | 76 | 60 |
| #3 | hubba hubba | -1.98 | 33 | 47 |
| #4 | bmw enjoyer | -1.98 | 42 | 10 |
| #5 | ΠΌΡΡΠ° Π»ΡΡΠ²ΡΠ½ | -2.30 | 46 | 12 |





