








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 30 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 186 matches | ||
| Faceit | 81 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2367 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,518 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1627 | 17% |
| Smokes | 2519 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2742 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2630 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,141,764 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Barroso N$ | 65% | 23 |
| #2 | WotaK | 59% | 37 |
| #3 | TillerMaN | 54% | 242 |
| #4 | PouLi | 53% | 57 |
| #5 | WNM | 50% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Barroso N$ | 65% | 23 |
| #2 | WotaK | 59% | 37 |
| #3 | TillerMaN | 54% | 242 |
| #4 | PouLi | 53% | 57 |
| #5 | WNM | 50% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TillerMaN | 8 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | PouLi | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | WNM | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Barroso N$ | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TillerMaN | 977 | 0.19 | 25 min |
| #2 | PouLi | 353 | 0.29 | 7 min |
| #3 | WotaK | 329 | 0.40 | 9 min |
| #4 | WNM | 64 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | Barroso N$ | 45 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WotaK | +3.96 | 79 | 78 |
| #2 | Barroso N$ | +3.43 | 62 | 53 |
| #3 | TillerMaN | +1.09 | 59 | 71 |
| #4 | PouLi | +0.35 | 72 | 74 |
| #5 | KuramA | -0.78 | 39 | 55 |





