










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
749 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,878 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 449 | 24% |
| Smokes | 479 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 720 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 230 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $761,093 of utility $348 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Predator | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | Salanas | 55% | 20 |
| #3 | alec | 48% | 46 |
| #4 | lilweenclub | 44% | 9 |
| #5 | Carbon08 | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GIBLORD | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | alec | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Salanas | 2 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | bigmike | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | alec | 164 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #2 | GIBLORD | 73 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | Salanas | 61 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | bigmike | 33 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Carbon08 | 25 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Salanas | +6.43 | 79 | 51 |
| #2 | Predator | +4.67 | 70 | 51 |
| #3 | alec | +1.85 | 49 | 61 |
| #4 | lilweenclub | +0.34 | 33 | 39 |
| #5 | bigmike | +0.28 | 48 | 54 |





