








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 184 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3026 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,559 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3958 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1849 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 2694 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3058 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $740,555 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 157 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | toomuchSUGAR | 55% | 78 |
| #2 | Jacques Mesrine | 47% | 60 |
| #3 | G00N | 46% | 145 |
| #4 | marc tremblay | 31% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | toomuchSUGAR | 55% | 78 |
| #2 | Jacques Mesrine | 47% | 60 |
| #3 | G00N | 46% | 145 |
| #4 | marc tremblay | 31% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | G00N | 15 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | Jacques Mesrine | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | toomuchSUGAR | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | marc tremblay | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | G00N | 901 | 0.30 | 20 min |
| #2 | toomuchSUGAR | 314 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #3 | marc tremblay | 82 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | Jacques Mesrine | 81 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr4G ツ | +2.30 | 88 | 64 |
| #2 | toomuchSUGAR | +1.44 | 73 | 66 |
| #3 | G00N | +1.12 | 75 | 59 |
| #4 | marc tremblay | -3.01 | 69 | 59 |
| #5 | Jacques Mesrine | -4.71 | 52 | 46 |





