










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 557 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




104 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4057 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,598 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3232 | 38% |
| Smokes | 2006 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1535 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1825 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $831,909 of utility $62 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4296 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jkSs | 73% | 60 |
| #2 | Goku-Smurf | 59% | 51 |
| #3 | ⇷Luther⇸ | 58% | 59 |
| #4 | Goku | 56% | 322 |
| #5 | ShadowPro{Im Him} | 49% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Goku-Smurf | 59% | 51 |
| #3 | ⇷Luther⇸ | 58% | 59 |
| #4 | Goku | 56% | 322 |
| #5 | ShadowPro{Im Him} | 49% | 41 |
| #6 | 𝙰𝚜𝚜𝚊𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚇 | 42% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goku | 25 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | jkSs | 13 | 0.0106 |
| #3 | ⇷Luther⇸ | 9 | 0.0073 |
| #4 | Goku-Smurf | 6 | 0.0061 |
| #5 | 𝙰𝚜𝚜𝚊𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚇 | 3 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goku | 882 | 0.13 | 18 min |
| #2 | 𝙰𝚜𝚜𝚊𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚇 | 479 | 0.31 | 10 min |
| #3 | ⇷Luther⇸ | 162 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | jkSs | 137 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Goku-Smurf | 133 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goku-Smurf | +4.53 | 77 | 51 |
| #2 | Goku | +3.33 | 73 | 52 |
| #3 | jkSs | +2.42 | 77 | 48 |
| #4 | ShadowPro{Im Him} | +0.71 | 56 | 33 |
| #5 | 𝙰𝚜𝚜𝚊𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚇 | +0.39 | 81 | 47 |





