








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 535 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 248 matches | ||
| Wingman | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Premier | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3679 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,069 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2784 | 20% |
| Smokes | 4498 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3632 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3155 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,064,967 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Jarz | 44% | 34 |
| #4 | Mister International | 44% | 100 |
| #5 | Bongo | 41% | 29 |
| #6 | ILoveAss2Minister | 40% | 176 |
| #7 | Tormi | 37% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mister International | +2.77 | 80 | 30 |
| #2 | reamees aadu | +1.64 | 86 | 59 |
| #3 | Jarz | +1.46 | 56 | 72 |
| #4 | Baba Yaga | +1.07 | 79 | 55 |
| #5 | Bongo | -0.55 | 70 | 49 |





