








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 119 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 62 matches | ||
| Premier | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4263 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,056 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6680 | 25% |
| Smokes | 6863 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 6172 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 7341 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $874,962 of utility $67 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 38 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lieless | 60% | 103 |
| #2 | tuw0pp | 60% | 208 |
| #3 | .ok | 58% | 180 |
| #4 | ![]() Oxy | 57% | 200 |
| #5 | Miaow | 56% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bird | +5.19 | 83 | 49 |
| #2 | tuw0pp | +3.58 | 90 | 40 |
| #3 | Miaow | +2.82 | 61 | 55 |
| #4 | Lieless | +1.88 | 83 | 41 |
| #5 | ![]() Oxy | +1.71 | 39 | 64 |






