








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 754 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 407 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 214 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 134 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 128 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 88 matches | ||
| Wingman | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 53 matches | ||
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




83 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9027 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,110 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4468 | 16% |
| Smokes | 7779 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 8589 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 6274 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,509,875 of utility $191 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1783 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bonkerz | +5.26 | 85 | 67 |
| #2 | daddyimpulse | +3.24 | 66 | 51 |
| #3 | nox | +2.49 | 78 | 55 |
| #4 | t0m | +1.76 | 82 | 55 |
| #5 | Your Dad's Favorite ♥ | -0.94 | 61 | 47 |





