










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 242 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3054 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,263 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2090 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2687 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2457 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2029 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $893,481 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DickEater42 | 81% | 16 |
| #2 | TS1 | 52% | 25 |
| #3 | Apex Hong | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DickEater42 | 81% | 16 |
| #2 | TS1 | 52% | 25 |
| #3 | Apex Hong | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TS1 | 5 | 0.0091 |
| #2 | Apex Hong | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | DickEater42 | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DickEater42 | 122 | 0.37 | 3 min |
| #2 | TS1 | 30 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | Apex Hong | 25 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DickEater42 | +9.00 | 98 | 60 |
| #2 | TS1 | +0.89 | 76 | 59 |
| #3 | Bozt | +0.74 | 70 | 59 |
| #4 | Apex Hong | -2.48 | 31 | 48 |





