








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 316 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Premier | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1634 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,599 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1499 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1022 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1607 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1471 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $562,853 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 460 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DICI | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | stussc | 51% | 104 |
| #3 | ln | 39% | 18 |
| #4 | catxau | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DICI | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | stussc | 51% | 104 |
| #3 | ln | 39% | 18 |
| #4 | catxau | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stussc | 10 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | catxau | 6 | 0.0282 |
| #3 | ln | 5 | 0.0132 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stussc | 279 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #2 | catxau | 52 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| #3 | ln | 42 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | DICI | 29 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DICI | +3.59 | 62 | 78 |
| #2 | </3 | +0.80 | 65 | 61 |
| #3 | stussc | +0.76 | 79 | 60 |
| #4 | ln | +0.39 | 84 | 64 |
| #5 | catxau | -4.64 | 29 | 57 |





