








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 315 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 190 matches | ||
| Premier | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2304 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,418 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6484 | 45% |
| Smokes | 3355 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3179 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1400 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $408,714 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 240 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GAMET ♕ | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | Y̷̷E̷̷Y̷̷O̷ ✞ | 65% | 26 |
| #3 | ☄️⚡Ramos!👑🔥 | 57% | 155 |
| #4 | NattJr | 57% | 53 |
| #5 | Ryuk-dA-Best | 54% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☄️⚡Ramos!👑🔥 | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | Ryuk-dA-Best | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Rainiier0o | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | d5nieL- | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | GAMET ♕ | 2 | 0.0049 |





