








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 368 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 63 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1311 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,076 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1828 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1661 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1346 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1241 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $590,043 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 231 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xygone | 62% | 53 |
| #2 | akhi | 60% | 42 |
| #3 | SKELL^ | 59% | 37 |
| #4 | SchultZ | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | moop2k | 57% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | SchultZ | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | moop2k | 57% | 28 |
| #6 | MathinoOo -M- | 53% | 34 |
| #7 | ❟❛❟YaJiN❟❛❟ | 40% | 10 |
| #8 | Até | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xygone | 186 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #2 | moop2k | 175 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #3 | akhi | 110 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | MathinoOo -M- | 95 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | SKELL^ | 92 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xygone | +1.82 | 63 | 73 |
| #2 | akhi | +1.65 | 67 | 50 |
| #3 | DelPiero | +1.60 | 76 | 73 |
| #4 | moop2k | -0.18 | 64 | 87 |
| #5 | ❟❛❟YaJiN❟❛❟ | -0.37 | 94 | 53 |





