










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
236 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 804 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 234 | 29% |
| Smokes | 271 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 158 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 141 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $17,264 of utility $28 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ʇɔɐnp | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | Petite Pute | 75% | 8 |
| #3 | Monarch | 64% | 14 |
| #4 | Masab23 | 63% | 16 |
| #5 | Kristina Finaldina | 62% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ʇɔɐnp | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | Petite Pute | 75% | 8 |
| #3 | Monarch | 64% | 14 |
| #4 | Masab23 | 63% | 16 |
| #5 | Kristina Finaldina | 62% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kristina Finaldina | 3 | 0.0110 |
| #2 | Masab23 | 1 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | ʇɔɐnp | 1 | 0.0089 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kristina Finaldina | 73 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #2 | Masab23 | 51 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| #3 | Monarch | 51 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #4 | Petite Pute | 17 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #5 | ʇɔɐnp | 4 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Petite Pute | +4.01 | 61 | 29 |
| #2 | ʇɔɐnp | +3.96 | 68 | 63 |
| #3 | Kristina Finaldina | +1.97 | 48 | 49 |
| #4 | Masab23 | +0.15 | 58 | 32 |
| -1.17 | 32 | 32 |





