








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 72 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 359 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3464 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,822 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4645 | 39% |
| Smokes | 2997 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2442 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1738 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $493,605 of utility $56 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aukku6 | 48% | 106 |
| #2 | Tellervo Huovinen | 47% | 30 |
| #3 | naali | 44% | 88 |
| #4 | 𝒜𝒶𝓉𝑜𝓈 | 44% | 136 |
| #5 | METSÄNPEIKKO22 | 44% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | naali | 44% | 88 |
| #4 | 𝒜𝒶𝓉𝑜𝓈 | 44% | 136 |
| #5 | METSÄNPEIKKO22 | 44% | 39 |
| #6 | juge the destroyer | 42% | 64 |
| #7 | aade | 40% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | juge the destroyer | 16 | 0.0115 |
| #2 | 𝒜𝒶𝓉𝑜𝓈 | 11 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Aukku6 | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | naali | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | aade | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aukku6 | 324 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #2 | juge the destroyer | 192 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #3 | naali | 134 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | aade | 106 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | METSÄNPEIKKO22 | 36 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aukku6 | +1.63 | 66 | 60 |
| #2 | naali | +1.37 | 63 | 55 |
| #3 | Tellervo Huovinen | +1.36 | 72 | 45 |
| #4 | juge the destroyer | -0.41 | 47 | 46 |
| #5 | METSÄNPEIKKO22 | -0.63 | 43 | 50 |





