








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 16 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
400 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 953 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 275 | 29% |
| Smokes | 289 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 189 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 200 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $77,929 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | doi ban ban kinh vl | 50% | 2 |
| #2 | NULL APOPHENIA | 50% | 8 |
| #3 | xcc | 50% | 18 |
| #4 | Đức Phít | 50% | 22 |
| #5 | diccnballs | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Đức Phít | 2 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | diccnballs | +4.65 | 92 | 57 |
| #2 | noar | +2.78 | 70 | 54 |
| #3 | xcc | +2.25 | 80 | 50 |
| #4 | NULL APOPHENIA | +0.33 | 80 | 53 |
| #5 | no1cehax | -0.28 | 85 | 10 |





