








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 587 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 149 matches | ||
| Wingman | 28 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2461 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,298 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 980 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1338 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 864 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1116 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,280,600 of utility $283 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 525 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spooderman | 54% | 101 |
| #2 | wasss | 53% | 129 |
| #3 | Mouni | 53% | 34 |
| #4 | Kytis | 48% | 94 |
| #5 | myyrä (eläin) | 47% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Kytis | 48% | 94 |
| #5 | myyrä (eläin) | 47% | 72 |
| #6 | osuja | 41% | 17 |
| #7 | Short Buss | 36% | 55 |
| #8 | nissine | 27% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spooderman | 28 | 0.0133 |
| #2 | Kytis | 18 | 0.0091 |
| #3 | wasss | 13 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | myyrä (eläin) | 9 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | Short Buss | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spooderman | 261 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | wasss | 207 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | Short Buss | 188 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #4 | myyrä (eläin) | 125 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | Kytis | 64 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tony Halme | +3.60 | 66 | 52 |
| #2 | nissine | -0.14 | 55 | 56 |
| #3 | wasss | -0.15 | 65 | 45 |
| #4 | myyrä (eläin) | -0.39 | 47 | 61 |
| #5 | osuja | -0.64 | 42 | 47 |





