








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1059 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 143 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2769 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,275 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1070 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1328 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1680 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2197 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $604,672 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 206 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | godfather sq | 51% | 39 |
| #2 | Doflamingo | 49% | 138 |
| #3 | godfather (oblation) | 48% | 135 |
| #4 | navigator D zoro | 48% | 122 |
| #5 | ✪︎ chasedup ✪ | 47% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Doflamingo | 49% | 138 |
| #3 | godfather (oblation) | 48% | 135 |
| #4 | navigator D zoro | 48% | 122 |
| #5 | ✪︎ chasedup ✪ | 47% | 19 |
| #6 | CoC^iNe | 47% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Doflamingo | 19 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | navigator D zoro | 11 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | ✪︎ chasedup ✪ | 4 | 0.0099 |
| #4 | godfather (oblation) | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | CoC^iNe | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | godfather (oblation) | 272 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #2 | Doflamingo | 236 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | navigator D zoro | 119 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | CoC^iNe | 119 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | godfather sq | 94 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛乡✪GS MAVERICK乡 | +2.88 | 81 | 60 |
| #2 | godfather (oblation) | +0.20 | 71 | 58 |
| #3 | Doflamingo | +0.16 | 82 | 52 |
| #4 | godfather sq | +0.13 | 62 | 59 |
| #5 | ✪︎ chasedup ✪ | -0.94 | 50 | 54 |





