








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1665 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 643 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Wingman | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 25 different maps





Our logs show 60 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




175 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9270 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,872 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11474 | 37% |
| Smokes | 8136 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5574 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5688 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,645,276 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4580 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GeT_JeNs | 61% | 62 |
| #2 | 1dlesniper | 59% | 66 |
| #3 | "Wi-Fi" | 54% | 533 |
| #4 | cybtr | 54% | 211 |
| #5 | Obunga | 50% | 198 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | MadM | 48% | 93 |
| #7 | Mesut Özil | 47% | 96 |
| #8 | .korwy | 44% | 66 |
| #9 | r1fla | 43% | 154 |
| #10 | Harald | 35% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harald | 51 | 0.0297 |
| #2 | cybtr | 42 | 0.0104 |
| #3 | Mesut Özil | 31 | 0.0164 |
| #4 | Obunga | 29 | 0.0076 |
| #5 | "Wi-Fi" | 22 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | "Wi-Fi" | 1502 | 0.14 | 41 min |
| #2 | r1fla | 443 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #3 | cybtr | 315 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #4 | GeT_JeNs | 245 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #5 | 1dlesniper | 242 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GeT_JeNs | +3.33 | 68 | 76 |
| #2 | 1dlesniper | +1.97 | 81 | 70 |
| #3 | .domo | +1.72 | 81 | 64 |
| #4 | "Wi-Fi" | +1.23 | 82 | 67 |
| #5 | Mesut Özil | +0.02 | 75 | 64 |





