








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2254 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 433 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 318 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 176 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 145 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 98 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11873 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,828 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10485 | 29% |
| Smokes | 10102 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 7049 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 8192 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,985,062 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1455 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | π‘π¦π°π π¦ππ©ine | 49% | 187 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | π‘π¦π°π π¦ππ©ine | 49% | 187 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | π‘π¦π°π π¦ππ©ine | 6 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | π‘π¦π°π π¦ππ©ine | 610 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cold β
| +1.25 | 84 | 67 |
| #2 | π‘π¦π°π π¦ππ©ine | -1.74 | 51 | 55 |





