








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 94 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
936 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,974 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 802 | 27% |
| Smokes | 698 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 941 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 533 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $321,260 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 40 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | G59 | 50% | 28 |
| #2 | jodagehts | 45% | 69 |
| #3 | FcePnch | 38% | 16 |
| #4 | bomber | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | G59 | 50% | 28 |
| #2 | jodagehts | 45% | 69 |
| #3 | FcePnch | 38% | 16 |
| #4 | bomber | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jodagehts | 7 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | G59 | 2 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | FcePnch | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jodagehts | 134 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #2 | G59 | 97 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #3 | FcePnch | 35 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | bomber | 12 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bomber | +4.53 | 89 | 63 |
| #2 | G59 | +1.69 | 63 | 60 |
| #3 | FcePnch | +1.24 | 79 | 60 |
| #4 | jodagehts | -0.79 | 31 | 59 |
| #5 | blago | -1.24 | 37 | 51 |





