








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 230 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
850 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,440 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1840 | 41% |
| Smokes | 1117 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 686 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 797 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $126,322 of utility $53 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 54 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Vebee | 55% | 44 |
| #3 | Maalari | 48% | 21 |
| #4 | [_!tryset!_] | 47% | 15 |
| #5 | vbe | 43% | 7 |
| #6 | Veetu17 | 43% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vebee | 6 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | [_!tryset!_] | 4 | 0.0136 |
| #3 | Maalari | 3 | 0.0065 |
| #4 | vbe | 2 | 0.0137 |
| #5 | Veetu17 | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Veetu17 | 182 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #2 | Vebee | 169 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | Maalari | 87 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #4 | [_!tryset!_] | 86 | 0.29 | 2 min |
| #5 | vbe | 36 | 0.25 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vbe | +5.20 | 62 | 74 |
| #2 | Vebee | +3.28 | 66 | 71 |
| #3 | Maalari | +1.64 | 72 | 50 |
| #4 | [_!tryset!_] | +0.34 | 62 | 59 |
| #5 | Veetu17 | -0.40 | 71 | 52 |





