








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 137 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 146 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 160 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1983 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,478 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1572 | 29% |
| Smokes | 570 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 1970 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 1366 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,064,871 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 51 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Inachus | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | akumu | 4 | 0.0062 |
| #3 | Ein Stoned | 3 | 0.0068 |
| #4 | Pik-As | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Fгσggεг | 2 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Inachus | 154 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #2 | Pik-As | 124 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | paolo_blanko | 58 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | akumu | 43 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Mex ム カ デ | 34 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Inachus | +6.67 | 89 | 60 |
| #2 | Ein Stoned | +4.32 | 63 | 49 |
| #3 | Fгσggεг | +2.05 | 70 | 58 |
| #4 | akumu | +1.72 | 50 | 39 |
| #5 | Pik-As | +0.70 | 54 | 63 |





