










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 155 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 315 matches | ||
| Faceit | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3549 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,554 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4065 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1885 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 3602 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 4002 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,499,508 of utility $218 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2026 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Ojan | 50% | 32 |
| #7 | Fl0rc | 49% | 67 |
| #8 | MevliN | 44% | 27 |
| #9 | 〄ArZy〄 | 41% | 69 |
| #10 | bolognese | 32% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ojan | 11 | 0.0168 |
| #2 | Fl0rc | 9 | 0.0121 |
| #3 | 〄ArZy〄 | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | ✪d3nis | 1 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Impossible | 310 | 0.29 | 8 min |
| #2 | 〄ArZy〄 | 238 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #3 | Fici | 187 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #4 | Fl0rc | 89 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | kuzma | 75 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fici | +3.10 | 86 | 69 |
| #2 | Fl0rc | +1.85 | 87 | 50 |
| #3 | Mr_Tuna | +1.13 | 72 | 49 |
| #4 | Ojan | +0.83 | 82 | 46 |
| #5 | ✪d3nis | +0.78 | 71 | 74 |





