








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 20 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1158 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,556 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 517 | 20% |
| Smokes | 850 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 838 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 351 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $291,347 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aikq11 | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | LN ( ͡❛ ͜ʖ ͡❛ ) | 50% | 36 |
| #3 | rasmus171008.rc | 41% | 37 |
| #4 | Kj34r | 40% | 10 |
| #5 | Micro | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | LN ( ͡❛ ͜ʖ ͡❛ ) | 50% | 36 |
| #3 | rasmus171008.rc | 41% | 37 |
| #4 | Kj34r | 40% | 10 |
| #5 | Micro | 36% | 25 |
| #6 | The Night | 25% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Micro | 7 | 0.0206 |
| #2 | rasmus171008.rc | 3 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | LN ( ͡❛ ͜ʖ ͡❛ ) | 2 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | aikq11 | 1 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Micro | 56 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #2 | rasmus171008.rc | 42 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | LN ( ͡❛ ͜ʖ ͡❛ ) | 38 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | aikq11 | 24 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | Kj34r | 21 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Micro | +8.76 | 80 | 74 |
| #2 | Atreq | +1.39 | 59 | 43 |
| #3 | Kj34r | -0.51 | 29 | 19 |
| #4 | LN ( ͡❛ ͜ʖ ͡❛ ) | -0.75 | 62 | 44 |
| #5 | aikq11 | -1.31 | 37 | 39 |





