








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 34 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 47 matches | ||
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1173 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,610 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 827 | 23% |
| Smokes | 762 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1011 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1010 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $501,908 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 93 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sad Gubert | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | am like super cool | 67% | 15 |
| #3 | XYoshiZ | 65% | 51 |
| #4 | Twija | 64% | 67 |
| #5 | just chillin in o'block | 63% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XYoshiZ | 8 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | just chillin in o'block | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Sad Gubert | 2 | 0.0116 |
| #4 | am like super cool | 1 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XYoshiZ | +5.04 | 98 | 65 |
| #2 | am like super cool | +3.16 | 82 | 61 |
| #3 | just chillin in o'block | +2.71 | 87 | 30 |
| #4 | Twija | +1.96 | 61 | 81 |
| #5 | Sad Gubert | +1.90 | 68 | 57 |





