








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 566 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 195 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 149 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3208 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,344 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3364 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4272 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3566 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3142 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $806,760 of utility $83 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1495 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | homework | 38% | 29 |
| #2 | Incredible Chunk | 32% | 34 |
| #3 | Slendamann | 32% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | homework | 38% | 29 |
| #2 | Incredible Chunk | 32% | 34 |
| #3 | Slendamann | 32% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slendamann | 5 | 0.0097 |
| #2 | homework | 2 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Incredible Chunk | 100 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #2 | homework | 62 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Slendamann | 48 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | homework | +3.31 | 68 | 60 |
| #2 | ❂ Milo | -1.36 | 28 | 54 |
| #3 | Incredible Chunk | -2.26 | 36 | 65 |
| #4 | Slendamann | -2.62 | 18 | 50 |





