








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 231 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 84 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1493 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,800 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1528 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1286 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 845 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1141 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $313,885 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 125 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hasch2K | 67% | 12 |
| #2 | Rimu Aka Le Bougsier | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | Frey | 57% | 23 |
| #4 | Kuang | 41% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hasch2K | 67% | 12 |
| #2 | Rimu Aka Le Bougsier | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | Frey | 57% | 23 |
| #4 | Kuang | 41% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kuang | 13 | 0.0197 |
| #2 | hasch2K | 2 | 0.0071 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kuang | 262 | 0.40 | 7 min |
| #2 | hasch2K | 100 | 0.35 | 3 min |
| #3 | Frey | 91 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | Rimu Aka Le Bougsier | 36 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frey | +1.99 | 85 | 63 |
| #2 | Rimu Aka Le Bougsier | +1.44 | 83 | 53 |
| #3 | HeBi | +1.00 | 70 | 59 |
| #4 | Kuang | +0.72 | 80 | 39 |
| #5 | hasch2K | -0.90 | 50 | 76 |





