








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 378 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 168 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2701 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,445 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1456 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1495 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1948 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1546 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,085,232 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 343 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3K elo god | 71% | 17 |
| #2 | AlekScouterEcouteurs | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | zbeub zbeub | 56% | 50 |
| #4 | Nexus | 44% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3K elo god | 71% | 17 |
| #2 | AlekScouterEcouteurs | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | zbeub zbeub | 56% | 50 |
| #4 | Nexus | 44% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zbeub zbeub | 5 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Nexus | 3 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | 3K elo god | 1 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | AlekScouterEcouteurs | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zbeub zbeub | 152 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | Nexus | 91 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #3 | 3K elo god | 87 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #4 | AlekScouterEcouteurs | 24 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3K elo god | +3.92 | 88 | 70 |
| #2 | zbeub zbeub | +1.81 | 70 | 51 |
| #3 | Jauris | +0.35 | 82 | 52 |
| #4 | AlekScouterEcouteurs | +0.03 | 65 | 55 |
| #5 | Nexus | -0.83 | 59 | 61 |





