








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 240 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 273 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 147 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3193 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,111 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1229 | 12% |
| Smokes | 3421 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2844 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2617 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,422,303 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 219 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fablek | 55% | 20 |
| #2 | pAuL ♿ | 53% | 94 |
| #3 | Kressie | 51% | 74 |
| #4 | -Schlosser- | 49% | 284 |
| #5 | guckguck | 48% | 161 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Salino | 8 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | -Schlosser- | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | guckguck | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | sTraucH | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Kressie | 5 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pAuL ♿ | +1.56 | 80 | 25 |
| #2 | Kressie | +1.55 | 63 | 50 |
| #3 | Fablek | +1.31 | 79 | 50 |
| #4 | -Schlosser- | +1.13 | 59 | 73 |
| #5 | real-Nic | +1.02 | 55 | 42 |





