










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
519 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 558 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 147 | 26% |
| Smokes | 131 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 209 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 71 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $242,226 of utility $272 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zéro | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | Djokos-KILLU | 75% | 4 |
| #3 | Taikan | 67% | 6 |
| #4 | AsBraikR | 64% | 11 |
| #5 | Lelastique | 47% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lelastique | 2 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | bocchi | 2 | 0.0100 |
| #3 | Ako GPT | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lelastique | 47 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #2 | Ako GPT | 34 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | bocchi | 30 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | AsBraikR | 14 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #5 | Taikan | 14 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Djokos-KILLU | +2.26 | 54 | 19 |
| #2 | zekoooo | +1.39 | 77 | 38 |
| #3 | bocchi | +0.78 | 63 | 43 |
| #4 | Ako GPT | +0.75 | 77 | 52 |
| #5 | Lelastique | +0.60 | 67 | 71 |





