








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 52 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 48 matches | ||
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1896 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,831 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1269 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2377 | 41% |
| HE Grenades | 1101 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1084 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $737,310 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 49 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Black Guy | 23 | 0.0098 |
| #2 | aug | 15 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Roger Rabbit | 12 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Z | 11 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | Visions of Chudtopia | 5 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z | 141 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #2 | Black Guy | 116 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #3 | aug | 115 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #4 | Visions of Chudtopia | 65 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Roger Rabbit | 45 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Black Guy | +6.00 | 67 | 37 |
| #2 | Z | +0.84 | 72 | 23 |
| #3 | aug | -0.88 | 41 | 33 |
| #4 | Visions of Chudtopia | -1.06 | 37 | 34 |
| #5 | Meaningless huh | -1.49 | 29 | 37 |





