








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 519 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 201 matches | ||
| Wingman | 79 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2932 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,793 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3480 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3201 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1400 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 2712 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $940,485 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 20 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ImVildehhh | 49% | 87 |
| #2 | shoNdel | 49% | 293 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ImVildehhh | 49% | 87 |
| #2 | shoNdel | 49% | 293 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shoNdel | 58 | 0.0105 |
| #2 | ImVildehhh | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shoNdel | 1734 | 0.31 | 49 min |
| #2 | ImVildehhh | 162 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shoNdel | +1.22 | 55 | 74 |
| #2 | sHm4u | +0.36 | 46 | 69 |
| #3 | ImVildehhh | -1.22 | 57 | 52 |





