








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 516 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 464 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3975 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,310 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3533 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4819 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3209 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3749 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,046,719 of utility $192 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 326 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Handy | 59% | 73 |
| #2 | J0RM4 | 54% | 243 |
| #3 | Jake | 50% | 263 |
| #4 | Beari | 49% | 236 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Handy | 59% | 73 |
| #2 | J0RM4 | 54% | 243 |
| #3 | Jake | 50% | 263 |
| #4 | Beari | 49% | 236 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jake | 9 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | J0RM4 | 8 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Handy | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Beari | 2 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Beari | 627 | 0.12 | 18 min |
| #2 | Jake | 514 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #3 | J0RM4 | 290 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #4 | Handy | 64 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Handy | +1.81 | 64 | 50 |
| #2 | faia paua | +1.07 | 44 | 63 |
| #3 | J0RM4 | -0.65 | 64 | 54 |
| #4 | Jake | -0.77 | 46 | 59 |
| #5 | Beari | -1.10 | 54 | 62 |





