








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 140 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1906 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,013 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 548 | 8% |
| Smokes | 1669 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2798 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 1998 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $350,512 of utility $56 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kobra_koddi | 64% | 33 |
| #2 | Cooper | 57% | 30 |
| #3 | niXxen | 50% | 153 |
| #4 | Rob | 46% | 76 |
| #5 | CaspeR | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | niXxen | +2.00 | 59 | 70 |
| #2 | kobra_koddi | +0.66 | 57 | 59 |
| #3 | Phil | +0.09 | 41 | 59 |
| #4 | Kubabo | +0.05 | 75 | 41 |
| #5 | Rob | -0.06 | 44 | 63 |





