








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 641 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 254 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 44 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3903 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,695 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2241 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3204 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2769 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3481 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,376,007 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 462 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | m0n3y-Ninzija | 52% | 165 |
| #7 | D1o | 51% | 126 |
| #8 | Q-Brick | 50% | 58 |
| #9 | Eddie Smurphy | 50% | 60 |
| #10 | NueSschen™ | 49% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | m0n3y-Ninzija | 13 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Eddie Smurphy | 11 | 0.0096 |
| #3 | D1o | 8 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | SickzSensei | 7 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Weesti | 6 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | m0n3y-Ninzija | 655 | 0.19 | 19 min |
| #2 | D1o | 507 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #3 | uⓃoSan☭ | 280 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | Eddie Smurphy | 219 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | SickzSensei | 189 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | m0n3y-Ninzija | +2.36 | 77 | 69 |
| #2 | sew1es | +2.15 | 68 | 58 |
| #3 | SickzSensei | +0.72 | 57 | 52 |
| #4 | D1o | +0.67 | 69 | 60 |
| #5 | Q-Brick | +0.56 | 74 | 61 |





