








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 570 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 142 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2497 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,424 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3361 | 40% |
| Smokes | 2181 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1654 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1228 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $467,882 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 56 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ..:: Desconocido ::.. | 71% | 17 |
| #2 | ♿The Charcuter Is Talking ♿ | 67% | 12 |
| #3 | 𝕭𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖔 | 67% | 18 |
| #4 | BOT McLovin | 67% | 18 |
| #5 | s3rg1x | 61% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | シ Hinata Shoyo ツ | 9 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | BOT McLovin | 7 | 0.0245 |
| #3 | MAST3R | 6 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | s3rg1x | 6 | 0.0096 |
| #5 | gviper6 hellcase.com | 2 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | シ Hinata Shoyo ツ | 300 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #2 | MAST3R | 223 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #3 | s3rg1x | 174 | 0.28 | 4 min |
| #4 | AlucarD | 121 | 0.34 | 3 min |
| #5 | ..:: Desconocido ::.. | 104 | 0.29 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s3rg1x | +2.90 | 83 | 66 |
| #2 | BOT McLovin | +2.35 | 78 | 46 |
| #3 | ムルブラヒャン | +2.06 | 76 | 67 |
| #4 | 𝕭𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖔 | +1.16 | 72 | 61 |
| #5 | シ Hinata Shoyo ツ | +1.11 | 81 | 69 |





