








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1622 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 875 matches | ||
| Faceit | 100 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10158 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,335 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4779 | 17% |
| Smokes | 8654 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 6857 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 8045 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,177,634 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 427 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kurttis | 63% | 82 |
| #2 | =( | 60% | 77 |
| #3 | masqutti | 59% | 94 |
| #4 | crito | 54% | 63 |
| #5 | Irwin | 52% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kurttis | +3.36 | 83 | 62 |
| #2 | Cadaveri | +1.20 | 52 | 68 |
| #3 | Irwin | +0.73 | 60 | 74 |
| #4 | masqutti | +0.72 | 43 | 65 |
| #5 | BÖPIS | +0.65 | 69 | 63 |





