








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 138 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 163 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2655 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,639 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1806 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1583 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1136 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1114 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $747,657 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 466 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Mr. Birb | 56% | 41 |
| #5 | Mober badass cowboy | 53% | 57 |
| #6 | M'aiq The Liar | 52% | 23 |
| #7 | silja | 50% | 20 |
| #8 | Esko | 50% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mober badass cowboy | 6 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Esko | 6 | 0.0073 |
| #3 | silja | 3 | 0.0075 |
| #4 | Studio 57 | 1 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Takumi | +4.19 | 75 | 63 |
| #2 | Mober badass cowboy | -0.14 | 37 | 52 |
| #3 | M'aiq The Liar | -0.55 | 40 | 45 |
| #4 | Mr. Birb | -0.77 | 67 | 37 |
| #5 | Studio 57 | -1.34 | 70 | 57 |





